Thursday, June 24, 2010

I am the first one up today. I'm under my covers texting this to my blog. I'm freezing so I slipped on my blue hospital socks, added black yoga pants and my Roxy hoody and topped off my savvy fashion with a pink custom hand made beanie - you'd think it was mid winter in my house! I've been laying here with thoughts of cancer traipsing through my head. Can't decide what's more ugly, the cancer itself, having my breast cut off or loosing my hair. Then I think "Really? For Real? I have cancer? Such a mean word. Why? How come? There are SO many solutions to kill it but NONE to prevent it?? Why, why, why?? I can't make sense of it. I'm the kinda girl that always asked why, my mom can so attest to that. "Wendy, don't eat that before dinner", why? "Wendy, get down from the rafters, well why? Wendy don't touch that hot pot", "why?", "Wendy stop hitting your sister", "why?" "because I said so doesn't work for me

1 comment:

  1. I'm also a "why" person...though "because I said so" never does it for me. Having seen/participated/gone through challenges (not that I'm attempting to reduce cancer to a "challenge") I always found that the majority of people would react one of the following ways:

    a) avoid me because they don't have a clue what to say.
    b) share some lame story or faith-promoting-rumor.

    Both reactions left me feeling alone in the end, best intentions aside.

    Strangely, the only solace I have ever found has been in recognizing that everything supposedly happens for a reason, but a lot of stuff that happens is just plain stupid, sucks, and hurts like hell. No one gets off the rock without suffering, and no one gets out of here alive. We have no choice in the matter. So we live life and make the best out of things. In the end someone is going to make it all better.

    You're always so positive and I learn and get motivation from you all the time. I know that you have your bad days too, but that makes you that much more likable because you're REAL.

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