Sunday, August 15, 2010

Redefining HOPE

Whenever my head hits the pillow at the end of my day, my thoughts are a whirlwind pattern of constant images of cancer, feelings about it, the dread of chemo, imagining the outcome of my surgeries, the not knowing of everything. That word HOPE that saunters alongside every breast cancer ribbon and slogan disturbs me instead of comforting me when I'm feeling such things. I'm anxious about it. I'm supposed to find comfort in this word HOPE when I'm feeling scared, intimidated or alone about having cancer and yet I find it to be quite the opposite. HOPE: 'the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best'. I'm unsettled. HOPE is not enough for me. Believe and Faith and Live are words I replace hope with. There is a sense of personal action when I believe and have faith and above all LIVE. Hope is a word that floats like a feather and you 'hope' it lands in your hand. That's not good enough for me. I won't 'hope' along side breast cancer, I will LIVE alongside it and battle and overcome. 


  1. I just want to say thanks for being such an inspiration! You are so positive and have such an amazing outlook. Whenever I read your blog I am uplifted. You are so strong and such an example to me. Thank you for sharing your journey!!

  2. And the most important thing to remember right after believe, faith, and love...the love of a Heavenly Father who will be there for you every step of the way thru this trial, and the love of family and friends. I know how discouraging life can get, but knowing He loves me and walks with me every day makes it bearable are in my thoughts and prayers every single day...hang in there.


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